>Bite me on the neck<


it's no good. Depeche mode

In a world full of lies... how do you know what is true and what is false? I mean, even if you are almost sure, it's not enough, you will always have a doubt about yourself, about him, about the life. Paranoia, they say, but actually it is not paranoia, it's a very strong feeling that makes you feel insecure, afraid of your feelings and the answers you get of anyone you know.

Sometimes I feel the needing of trust in someone, in something. To be blind and put my faith in other one's head. Sometimes I NEED to trust. Today is for example, one of these days when I'm afraid (again) of being disappointed or, in other words, get something different of what I expect.

To go or not to go....

Let me tell you about this problem. Last week, during my dead days when I had nothing to do but chat or download music (Tuesday ), I open my nowadays favorite chat and started to chat with a-guy-Idon't-remember-his-nickname. I wasn't a good chat, he was too common and his description was mediocre. I gave him my cell phone numer but actually I thought he wouldn't call because of the way I cut our conversation.

He called.

He has a very sexy voice; a mix between naive and strong guy. He has this... str8 touch/kind of talking that turns me on. There was something more that I didn't like: he uses lots of double-sense phrases and 'jokes' that are really stupid or boring sometimes.

And he continue calling me.... 1,2,4, 8 times.

He says he likes me and he want to know me, actually he is very sweet sometimes, and against what I expect, I like it.

Should I met him today or not?

I think he won't accept another negative this time. Should I???

I want continue being faithful but what for?